by Amogelang Senokwane

My name is Amogelang Precious Senokwane, the only daughter of the late Dimakatso Senokoane and Ralebese Ruiter. I was born on the 3^rd March, 1987 at Hoopstad Hospital in Free State (FS).
I was raised in Hertzogville by my mom and great grandmother.
I have memories of my father from around five years old.  We went on to have six more incredibly close years before he passed on. I am forever grateful for those memories.

My earliest memories of being a lesbian perhaps go as far back as my toddler years.
For as long as I can remember, I have always been a tomboy.  I enjoyed playing soccer with the guys, building wired cars and playing house (mantlwane). I would always be the father and it was all normal to me.
Later in life, I saw a photo of myself when I was about 2 years old.  I was wearing a two piece (skirt) suit and I was crying. I asked my mom why I was miserable in the photo and she gave me a hilarious answer.  She said I was scared of white people.  It was funny and silly but I took her word.

Amogelang Senokwane in Muholi’s Faces & Phases (2009), Cape Town.

A year or so after my mom passed on, one of my aunts unintentionally let slip the real story behind my crying picture.  She told me my mom always tried to dress me in cute dresses but I hated them and that gave her an inkling of who I really was.  My dad treated me like a son in a way because he would always buy me boy`s clothing and take me to soccer and cricket games.  It felt like as a parent, my mother could not come to terms with my sexual orientation.  I have no doubt that she loved me regardless.

When it was time to face the world, I partially came out in 1999 to a friend of mine.
I told her I was having these weird feelings which I could not explain or understand.
I was attracted to girls. Her reaction surprised me.  She was calm and reassuring and assured me that it was normal.  It later made sense why she had reacted that way earlier – I found out later she was a lesbian!  It gave me courage to somewhat come out to my mom, but I think she was in denial.  She maybe thought I would outgrow that phase of my life.  I would later find out that she had known all along and had even confided in my uncle.

I found out my uncle knew when I decided it was time for me to formally come out to my family, confirming who the real Amo was. I did not wish for anyone to get their hopes up, thinking I would be getting married to a man.
I, of course, had pondered the many ways to do this and finally the bright idea to send an sms hit me.  I messaged everyone that mattered and then endured a laboured wait.
I had switched off my phone but the anticipation made me switch it back on again.  The first sms was from my aunt – the one who explained the miserable photo from way back way. She told me that she accepted me and loved me. Most family members responded positively.  Another wished she could ask me questions face to face.

My uncle had not responded by the next day and I was fretting. His response was particularly important because he was a stern man of few words.  He finally responded late in the evening of the next day.   He called me, said he loved me, would never stop and that he had known all along. He said my mom told him before she passed away.
The revelation left me with mixed feelings.  I was angry because I wished that my mom could have told me in her own words of her acceptance for me.   I also knew she loved me and did the best she could.

My aunt (mom’s sister) – has however not accepted me yet and it breaks my heart, because she’s my flesh and blood.  I will always be who I am without feeling the need to apologise.  In an ideal world both our wishes could be reality, but the reality is I am who I am, I did not choose.  I just wish she would accept who I am and love me as she did before I came out. My partner also has a similar challenge as some family members are still not accepting who she is.

Amo in a recent photo

I feel blessed that I met my partner who is a God loving and most importantly a God fearing woman.  I met Nozipho Jennifer Magagula in 2011.
In March 2012 she started living with me permanently. I proposed on her birthday which happens to be the 25^th December, 2011.
We started out as friends, but our feelings grew. I wanted to take it slowly because I had just come out of a relationship. We were friends for the first six (6) months and then our relationship evolved. She’s originally from Soshanguve so we had a long distance relationship at first.

I sent her an sms telling her how I felt on the 11^th of November 2011.

I asked to be my girlfriend and she did not say yes or no to my proposal, but I told myself that I am not giving up on this one. I would tell her that I love her and she would say “I know.”
She was probably wary of rushing too. I was persistent and never gave up.
On the 13^th of December she said yes, a day after she came to visit me in Cape Town.

It was not really a formal proposal but I gave her a promise ring. It was a promise from me to her assuring her that I am going to make her my wife one day. Both our families are aware of our relationship. My family is very supportive and loving. We both still need to perform a formal ceremony where both our families come together and get to formally know each other. Both families have, however, accepted us.  I feel blessed because I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.  Like any couple, we face difficulties here and there but because our spirituality is so important to us, we entrust everything to God.

We are optimistic about our future and we discuss important issues like children.  We have already established that we would like to have a family that will consist of two boys and two girls. We are already picking names for our four children.  I would like to start my own business and perhaps buy another home with a big yard and pool.  Although I already own a home in a beautiful surburb, I would like for us to buy a house as a married couple.

I am currently working at Eskom as an Instrument Technician.   I completed engineering studies in 2007 and earned a National Diploma in Electrical Engineering from the Cape Peninsula University of Technology (Cape Town Campus), in 2008.  Ultimately, I would like to obtain a B-Tech in Quality or Project Management.  I started out as a Technician in Training at Eskom in 2008, and became permanent on the 1^st of March 2010, having had a break in between because my 15 month contract had ended.  A permanent job was a blessing for me.  The gift of education had allowed me to start realising my dreams.

This is the reason that I feel education is the only way to a better life whichever form of education you chose always pays off.  When I went into my third year, my mother and father had passed on and I lost the ideal of why I was trying so hard.  When I went into third year I did not have money for registration. A friend of mine at tertiary scarified her needs and gave me her last money so that I could register for courses. It is rare for someone to do that for a complete stranger that they have only known for a few months.  That changed the trajectory of my life drastically, because I would not be where I am supposed to be.

As I had mentioned earlier both my parents have passed away.  My dad passed away in 1998 after a long illness, when I was still in primary school. I was left with my mom. She was unemployed, but she gave me her best and her all until I finished high school.
She supported me through tertiary school.  She worked piece jobs and sacrificed every cent for me so that I could have a better future. Unfortunately she passed away in early 2006, when I was doing my second year.  She passed away after a short illness. I felt like my life was over and I had no one else. I turned my back on my books and I did not study for my exams.  I locked up how I felt, because I was telling myself that the person I was studying for was no longer here, so nothing mattered. By the grace of God, I passed six of the seven subjects that I was doing that semester. That’s when everything changed. I knew that God was there and that I would never walk alone and since then I have made Him my friend and confidant.

It is with this spirit that I would like to pay it forward.  I would change other lesbian’s lives. If I had the opportunity, I would build or establish a safe house for lesbians who are kicked out of their homes for being who they are, rejected and disowned by their families. I want a place where they would be themselves, a place where they can express their talent, have a roof over their heads, a warm meal, some sense of peace and security in their lives.  I want a place they can call home that will be filled with love, laughter, compassion, and empathy.

I miss my parents. I had a younger sister but she passed away in 2001 when she was 2 months old.  I miss her dearly as well.  She would have been 12 years old.
I have an older half-sister from my dad’s side who stays in Botshabelo in Free State.
Sadly, we are not as close as I would like for us to be. We communicate telephonically and I wish I could share some of my cares with her since my mom is no longer alive.

I do think though I am doing a decent job looking after myself in this current climate of hatred towards the LGBTI community in South Africa. I stay in a very quiet suburb where everybody is minding their own business so I feel pretty safe.  I have not met people who have a problem with me or my sexuality.   If they then they do a pretty good job at hiding it.  I am a Butch lesbian, so I know that I am conspicuous. I feel more comfortable in male clothing, I feel whole. Although I look good in women`s clothing, I am not comfortable wearing it. The last time I wore a skirt was at my granddad’s brother’s funeral in 2006.

My sexual orientation is important to me because this is my core – it is me.
There will never be another Amogelang Precious Senokwane after this one has passed away. There’s a saying that goes “Always be you because everyone else is taken.” I understand that outwardly Amo is a woman and at the end of the day I am proud of the fact that I am a Black, Proud, Confident and Successful Lesbian.
That means I recognise my identities. I however want people to judge me by my substance not my sexual orientation.   That is very minimising.  I have a true sense of my identity and that is being true to myself and the people who love me and those whom I love.   It is not being afraid to let Amo shine just because Amo is a lesbian.
At the end of the day self-acceptance comes first, no one else will be proud or accept your identity if you do not accept yourself. “Those who matter don’t mind, but those who mind don’t matter.”

Obviously other lesbians, especially us black lesbians, have met different realities from mine.  It pains me a lot, looking back at where our country was many years ago and how much we have achieved and conquered yet we still have hateful heterosexists and homophobes who still feel that they need to prove a point. They say that God did not make Adam and Steve, but I also say God Himself said “I knew you before you were formed in your mother’s womb. All your day you were ordained even before your parents thought of having you.”
People should get educated and stop following other people. Listen more and talk less. They rape us to change us, if that does not work they kill us. You have taken a life, something only reserved for God.  You are condemned.

Why can people not practice what the Bible says about loving one another?
For me love is accepting the other person for who they are and them doing the same thing. Love is when both of you are willing to sacrifice and compromise a lot for each other. Love is remembering the silly little things that you did together. Silly little thing that your partner is doing or was doing and being there for each other through thick and thin. The true meaning of love is written in the Bible 1 Corinthians 13: 4-9, God is Love and when He is part of your lives nothing can break you.  

I am a fun, easy going person who enjoys playing soccer, watching movies, reading every now and then and just relaxing at home. I also love my community.
I believe in what we are doing to stay visible and never muted.  This is why I became part of the Faces and Phases series.
At first I thought I was doing it for fun, because I wanted to be in front of the lens well as helping a friend out with materials for her project. I never thought that it would be something this huge.
Faces and Phases has helped me a lot, because when my family saw the book and saw me and other lesbian there, it made them more proud of me and made them understand that there are other lesbians out there and we are here to stay.
My photo was also used in the Sowetan newspaper for an article. It boosted my confidence to another level.  A lot of people became curious and wanted to know more about my life and our lives as the black LGBTI community. A lot of lesbians especially in my home town became free and a couple of my friends saw my photo in the book and saw how proud I was of being me, it gave them the courage to come out and live their lives.

Two of them are being featured in the next edition of Faces and Phases (2006 – present), which is huge for us. We all come from a small town and yet we are conquering great mountains.
I hope this project will help a lot of other lesbians and gays to realize their inner strength and live their lives.
My final words would be that remember life may lead you where you least expected, but have faith.
You are exactly where you are supposed to be.

R-L: Lesego Tlhwale, Charmain Carrol, Akhona Hailele, Nqobile Zungu, Swazi Nkosi,
Simphiwe Mbatha, Collen Mfazwe, Maureen Velile Majola and Muholi Zanele
© Koketso Mohalane
24/08/2013

Missing in the photo were:  Kopano Sibeko, Lerato Dumse, Thekwane Mpisholo and Zandile Makhubu.

Where/ What: After the funeral of Collen Mfazwe’s grandmother, we had our group photo taken by a member of AmaQhawe Choir.

Camera used: Canon 60d with 17 – 85mm lens.

Location: Daveyton

by Jeremiah Sepotokele

2013 Aug. 17:  Gay and Lesbian Memory in Action (GALA) and MaThoko’s Books launched Queer Africa at the University of the Witwatersrand, Braamfontein.

Queer Africa is a collection of short fiction written by talented writers on queer lives and experiences. Edited by Karen Martin and Makhosazana Xaba, the two formed part of the panel which included Makgano Mamabolo (actress, writer and director) and Ashraf Johaardien (Head of Arts and Culture at University of Johannesburg).

Cover of the Queer Africa book launched on the 17th Aug. 2013.

The panel took on several discussions around the state of queer literature in South Africa and Prof. Tommaso Milan took on the handy task of facilitating the discussion.

The event was well attended by university students, academics and professionals. Just from observing the interaction between attendees as they firmly held on to their wine glasses, I could not resist the fresh reminder on how much of a privileged space it was.

As much as I acknowledge the platform that allows queer stories to be told, I will be sour once again and highlight why my celebration of the book was not complete.
Firstly the book is published in English and no other language is represented in the collection. I was taken apart by this considering the wealth of languages we have in our country. This also speaks seriously to structural inequality and how language is far from being separate from these politics.
How many individuals (even our queer folks) can express themselves thoroughly in English?
I think it’s important that these reproductions reflect our uniqueness and diversity as queer collectives and language is part of it all. I can imagine how refreshing it would be to read a story about a transgendered woman in Xhosa.

Secondly, the contributors of the compilation are quite distinguished writers and from reading their biographies they all possess or in the process of getting a university education.  That really makes sense why the book is published in English in the first place. Accessibility is still an issue and really demands our attention, and it cannot be ignored that this space is still privileged. I can only hope that the publishers extend the call for submissions next time to those who may not really have access to these platforms, as they may not necessarily be in the system that grants these incredible opportunities. Although publishers may complain about their capacity and budgetary constraints that will enable them to extend equal opportunity, there should be some effort in addressing this particularly.

I can complain all day long about this and as responsible social activists we should create consciousness around this issue whenever these projects are conceptualised. We come very far with our struggle as South African LGBTI community and without any further reservations, I am grateful that there is a book that tells our stories. These are our lives, our journeys and it is imperative that we have full ownership of them.
Ngiyabonga!!!

Previous on/ by Jeremiah

2013 Aug. 22: I Spoke to My Heart…

and


2013 Aug. 15: The documentation of black LGBTI in South Africa

and

2013 July 29: Education, Queer Youth, Hate Crimes: So where to from here?

and

2013 Aug. 13: Love Transcends and Love Prevails

and

2013 May 18: After Mask … Hear Us Out

by Maureen Velile Majola

I am in no position to write a piece to celebrate Women’s month
How do I even begin to celebrate
when women are raped every day in this country
When a girl child cannot trust any male figure in her life
When WE (women) can’t enjoy the freedom that was fought for in 1956

How do I even utter HAPPY Women’s day
When I am not happy to be a woman, living in a township.

Where do I begin?
How do I even say it without
thinking of all the women
who have been killed by their partners?

Without mentioning all the women
that have to live with secrets
of what their husband do to their girl children.

Without thinking of the 4 year old girl
Who has been molested and raped by her own flesh and blood?

Without me mentioning all the women
who report cases of violence
and receive secondary victimization from the police force?
Where do I start?

If I am to count all the teenagers,
young women, children, mothers, grandmothers and aunts
who have been victims of rape and abuse from the hands of men.

Where do I start with a celebration piece?
When there’s a woman fighting for her life in a hospital bed?

When there are women trying to press charges
at the police station and they’re turned down?

When there’s a child being sexually violated as I’m typing this?
How can I rejoice when I fear that,
having a vagina might just get me killed?

I am not about to pretend like I’m all excited that its Women’s month
When I am faced with bigger issues and problems with just being a woman
They may bruise you
Hurt you
Try to break you
Ridicule you
Call you unfit
Say you’re barren
and pull you down

Still, You remain a loving woman
You keep calm
And act rationally on every issue

You keep giving Love
Even to those that hurt you and your children

Indeed you are a forgiving Soul
You keep, keeping on because,
You believe that one day it will all come to an end
and one day
WE may all enjoy the Freedom given to us by the Women of 1956

Women have faith for one day
We, all will enjoy the fruits of our labor.

Previous by Maureen

2013 Aug. 13: Indlovukazi

and


2013 Aug. 6: My body as a subject of hate crime


and

2013 July 20: I’ve lived with her for years


and

2013 July 7: Trouble Soul


and

2013 June 21: The Princess of Norway pitched just for Muholi


and

2013 June 4: My Only Man


and

2013 May 16: Don’t touch ME!

and

2012 March 20: There’s a strawberry garden between your legs

 by Tinashe Wakapila

It’s no beautiful melody
when you hear a politician promising everything
but a human being’s life
First it was ‘worse than dogs and pigs’,
i thought oh well,
i have
 enough on my platter to deal with
so i brushed it off,
dusted my self up and smiled

Soon smiles turned into frowns and all happiness
drowned when it became…
‘we will behead them’…

Could these be the utterances of a human being lacking
knowledge or deliberately diverting attention by inciting hatred.
‘Jail them for two years lets see if they can conceive’ …

So much hatred in these elderly veins
Pushing murderers,
rapists and priests to torment my soul
My life is threatened, yet this is who i am.

Is it because of who i am that i deserve to die,
for who i am has prompted

Those in power to ignore me suffering
as they talk about peace yet for me they declare death
Its because I am what i am
that they threaten my hopes
Peace lies somewhere,
but as for me it is nowhere
all hope is but gone.

Like empty vessels,
i hear scary noises about lesbians from all angles.

I am in a dark room wondering if its the beginning of the end
or the 
end of the beginning…
Thoughts break my heart and eat me up,
like a female scorpion devouring itself with own venom

I am hurting myself

Should i die or should i try 

I will fight,
i will write because i am what i am

Why then would i choose to be gang raped
why would i want to be beheaded
Who would choose to be bashed and used as an election winning tool

Who would choose to lose privileges
When and how will you get that clear
I am who i am,
because i am
what i am

About the author

Tinashe Wakapila is a Zimbabwean LGBT rights activist in the LBT group Pakasipiti.
She is also a youth leader and a scriptwriter.

Photos by Nqobile Zungu

What:  2nd Mbokodo Awards

Where: The Theatre on the Track, Midrand

Organised by Carol Bouwer Productions

Click here for categories and nominees lists

Previous

Mbokodo Awards (2012)

Message from Minister of Arts & Culture, Paul Mashatile

Related articles

Mbokodo Awards honour South African women

by Kopano Sibeko

For any stereotypical person who is a South African,when you see the word iMbokodo you’ll think a straight/ hetero woman with children or a married woman with/out children.
It is a myth of course because there are many definitions or how iMbokodo individuals identify themselves.
Question what happens when a black – self identifying lesbian win Mbokodo award.
By the way iMbokodo derived from Wathint’ Abafazi, Wathint’ iMbokodo - English translation “You strike a woman, you strike a rock”)

Greeted by elegance as I stood outside The Theatre on the Track in Kyalami, Midrand, Johannesburg.
Surrounded by beautiful (intergenerational) women who were dressed to kill as they anticipated who will take the prestigious Mbokodo awards for different categories.
Themed titled “The Phoenix within me: African woman arise!” inspired by the great American poet Maya Angelou.
Without being too critical, am disturbed by the fact that we have not used own South African Maya’s for this theme since we have many who have written extensively on the very the same subject matter as they experience the Apartheid the divided the nation.

The second annual Mbokodo awards held on 29 August 2013, highlighted creative photography amongst many categories.  The beautiful ceremony honoured South African women who are deserving of being appreciated and recognised for their artistic works.
Photographers: Zanele Muholi, Neo Ntsoma and Marlene Neumann contended for the award that celebrates the creative use of photography in original and exciting ways.
According to the 2013 Mbokodo brochure the particular award ‘honours artists who through subject matter or technique expand the boundaries of their genre.’

The butch on stage after being announced as the winner of Creative Photography award…

Muholi through her wit and beliefs of visual activism received the award.

She voiced out that the award stands, “to honour all the women who gave birth to Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender and Intersex (LGBTI) children.”
Muholi emphasized that is not a sin for parents to give love and embrace their LGBTI children.
Also dedicated the award to the lost life of the brutally murdered lesbian, Duduzile Zozo from Thokoza East of Johannesburg.

Muholi delivering acceptance speech as she receives an ‘unexpected’ award on Thurs. 29th Aug. 2013.
Photo by Nqobile Zungu

In March 2013, Muholi received the Index on Censorship award for Freedom of Expression, London.
At the end of July 2013, received the Glamour award titling her as the Campaigner of the Year, Johannesburg.
In Aug. 2013 won the 2^nd Mbokodo award.

On the 26^th Aug. 2013, Muholi had an interview with Azania Mosaka of PowerFM and spoke about the importance of Visual Activism and her recent appointment as the Hononary Professor of the University of the Arts/Hochschule Fur Kunste Bremen.  She vehemently expressed that “ I didn’t expect this, but I feel honoured to be acknowledged as a person who holds such authority , especially in the work that I do.”
The honorary ceremony will take place on the 28^th October 2013, Bremen, Germany.

Azania described her as a globe trotter, Muholi continues to tour the world and speak about her subjective art of photography.  Muholi expressed in Glamour magazine’s August issue that “my mission is to ensure that there are positive images of black lesbians in the mainstream media.”
She has openly uttered that when she ponders about the time she was growing up, she never saw photographs of people like her (black lesbians) and that’s what inspired her to start documenting South African black lesbians.
She also mentioned that the only time that black lesbians are headlined in the mainstream media, are when they are hate crime survivors if not victims and at that point they are already dead to share their stories.  If at all that murder case becomes prominent like that of Eudy Simelane (1977- 2008); Noxolo Nogwaza (1987 -2011) and Duduzile Zozo (1987 – 2013).

The visual activist also featured in Drum Magazine earlier this year, she was questioned about her passion in photography and the LGBTI community, she said “I’m passionate about photography and especially documenting the black lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender communities because that’s a kind of social documentary that has not been captured sufficiently”.

“If it’s not documented it never happened” these are the words that Muholi commonly shares with her crew members of Inkanyiso, a developing media production that she founded in 2009.
Muholi strongly believes if something is not captured, through audio, video or photography’s one can never really defend its existence because there’s nothing tangible to show for it.

Muholi continues to add that “I feel like there’s not a lot of positive writing about black lesbians in our country. It’s up to us as black lesbians to change the negative imagery. We need to create a balance. Yes there’s violence, but there are positive stories to tell.”
She confesses that, that’s where the inception of Inkanyiso was awakened. “Who better to tell our stories than ourselves” she giggles.

“To be validated and recognised internationally you have to work hard “shares Muholi who also admits that her work is more recognised internationally than it is locally, she says that it saddens her that her work carries more weight in other countries than in SA.
Some South Africans are thirsty for queer content, and schools curricular need to inclusive Sexual Orientation studies and African Sexualities. In that way we will be able to negotiate our stance in our communities to further educate many who might not understand the LGBTI lives and realities.

It is rather rare that one interviews Muholi and doesn’t mention Lulu Xingwana in the same breathe, Muholi laughs and says “ now she’s an advocate for change and that’s all that matters”, she adds that people like giving Lulu unnecessary airtime.

Like almost every other women who was nominated at the awards Muholi shared her ‘unexpected’ joy, nervousness and gratitude to be recognized in a country where women were previously oppressed and disadvantaged.
The awards seek to continuously empower women to rise “The Mbokodo Awards are a poignant reminder of the custodial role women play in nurturing our society” believes Carol Bouwer, founder of Carol Bouwer Productions , Executive Producer of Mbokodo Awards.

Some of the presenters were:

Mara Louw who came on stage and joke about having a ‘Ben 10′

Our media personalities
L-R: Kgomotso Matsunyane & Kgopedi oa Namane presented some awards…

Centred, Thembi Mtshali-Jones won Theatre award.
In this photo she is franked by the dancer, Khabonina Qubeka and actress Fiona Ramsay.
Photo by Zanele Muholi

Some performing acts…

Great performance by Black & White Sarafina.
Photo by Zanele Muholi

For full view of 2013 Mbokodo winners. Click here

Previous by Kopano

2013 Aug. 13: Love Transcends and Love Prevails

by Collen Mfazwe

The month of August has to be a very challenging yet exciting time in my life. I lost my grandmother on the 17^th Aug. 2013 and 5 days later I was given my final results for my foundation course in photography at Market Photo Workshop, Newton, Johannesburg.

I remember after the heart breaking news about my grandmother’s death, they had called me at home to wish me luck.  It was really hard to be optimistic but I pushed myself to produce better display of my work and I produced best because surprisingly I manage to come second best in the course, this however was happily sad moment for me.

As I reflect, towards the end of my course things were not very well. I remember my granny was not ok and we all thought it’s not a big deal because she went to the doctor twice or thrice and the doctors didn’t say what exactly was the problem with her, but she was drinking all those pills that the Dr. gave her.
Somehow I had faith that they would make her better, though I have a clear vision of her sick(ness). I don’t know if God was testing my strength and faith. I was lost in my own world not knowing what to do and at that moment I was alone in the flat. I recalled vividly chatting to my sister like we always do on Saturday morning. I wanted to check if she’s ok but before she even responded I saw her Whatsapp status saying  “she was a great granny RIP grandmother.”

Collen Mfazwe  with family members at Phumulani cemetery, Daveyton, the day of her granny’s funeral on the 24th Aug. 2013
Photo by Zanele Muholi.

The shock hit me and I asked her quickly if our granny was gone.  She said yes and I didn’t believe her as tear drops fell consecutively on my face, at that point I remember I had to go to school  but I lost focus for a moment, there confused and  alone.
However that did not discourage me, I went to school anyways though I was not thinking straight but thank God I didn’t do anything stupid.  Sunday morning I went home anticipating that all I heard was a lie but when I got there everyone was there.
Sadly my granny was not and I tried hardly to convince myself that maybe she went to the mall to collect her pension grant (money) but as time went by my eyes were full of tears realizing that she’s gone not for temporary but for good. I realized that her time has arrived. I never thought I’d survive the week that followed.

Market Photo Workshop (MPW) became a second home to me because I spent every day of my two months studying there. I made a promise to myself that I did not want to let myself down and the people around me.  Most of all I did not want to let the person paying for my fees down not because I owed her, as she always says that I don’t owe her anything the only thing she wants to see is relevance.  I also wanted to prove that I am capable and that I can. Things were not easy, I promise, but I did my best. I proved that I can be the best as well.
We all know that photography is not all about pressing shutter button, there’s more to it than that and it is hard but I managed.  I mean when you want something you fight for it, you make sure you get it no matter how hard the situation can be.  You really work harder to get it. So I did exactly that.

When I left home and went to stay in Parktown because of school, my family at home they didn’t take me seriously.  That didn’t stop me from working very hard and my sisters were always there for me, they gave me support even though they didn’t understand what was really going on. Although they called and checked if I was doing ok.  We even chatted on whatsapp and I really appreciated that.
I’m not from a very wealthy family but the little things that my sister is doing for me and my siblings means a lot. I’m not talking only financially but the love and care that she is giving me is so extreme.
Currently I’m staying with an amazing crew in a lesbian shelter  where I also get strong support from the people I stay with.  We are not of the same age group but that doesn’t mean a thing to us because we all respect each other.

My sexuality doesn’t distract me due to things that I need to achieve. I’m so well aware that being a lesbian is not a career and it won’t put bread on the table. When you are a grown up like me, obviously your siblings are also expecting something from you. I like being a photographer but most of all I love taking photographs.

Now I’m just pondering on the fact that it is the end of women’s month in South Africa.  I have lost both my mother and my grandmother who were two great women in my life. I haven’t lost hope thanks to Nomthandazo Mfazwe my sister and Zanele Muholi for they are the reason that Women’s month gradually makes sense to me.

Related post

Inkanyiso crew supported the member and Majola family at the time of sadness.
© Koketso Mohalane
24/08/2013

Previous by/ featuring Collen

2013 July 13: Picturing Duduzile Zozo’s funeral

and

2013 April 16: Not just a handsome butch lesbian

by Kopano Sibeko

Sneaking in and out, private calls, unnecessary lies and scents of foreign colognes and fragrances all seem to be an impeccable way to assume that your partner is having an affair.  So a friend of mine has observed all these alerting traits of unfaithfulness and she is utterly convinced that her partner has a side-chick, oh so they call them.

Her reaction to this, was purely as expected, devastated. While sharing these life changing news she cried her eye balls out, as if she just heard of a death in her family.  Yes as friend I was obliged to comfort her and tell her that everything will be fine.  She’ll get over it.  She’s still young and she will sure meet someone who will be faithful and loyal to her and their relationship at all times and whilst debating what I just said in my mind.  The rational character in me believed that I lied to her, because truth is, they probably will cheat on her again.

The mental debate that I continuously have with myself is why do people tend to blame themselves when their partners cheat?
Yes I’ve also been victim to this because I mean it must make sense that there should be something wrong with you.  Or something wrong you’re doing or rather something you’re not doing at all that drove your partner into another’s arms.

My predicament is this, most of us have cheated either once, twice or most of our lives, and it really depends on how one weighs or qualifies the act of cheating and what determines cheating. Though to my shock people who are cheated on behave so much like victims.  As if they were never perpetrators before, funny how some of us like being all hypocritical as if we’ve never cheated. I’m not justifying cheating nor am I promoting it.  But if they cheat on you it has absolutely nothing to do with you, more often than not people get hurt because they think that there’s something wrong with them when their partner cheats.
It has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with their selfish reasons. Yes it affects you because that person is a part of you, but it’s not about YOU!
But then again those are my thoughts.

Having spoken to a lot of my friends about this subject matter, there are a percentage of things that incites cheating, be it sexual, emotional, spiritual, and financial or otherwise at the end of the day.  Cheating is an act of selfishness. I say this because it is self-beneficiary. As ridiculous as this may sound.  When someone cheats on you it doesn’t mean they don’t love you.   Sometimes maybe they don’t anymore but because of time spent in the relationship they might be scared to let go.
I mean I’ve been told that cheating depends on a situation, which in all instances is about the self.

People are prone to cheat if they are not happy.  Sometimes it’s not because you don’t make them happy, but because they are unhappy with themselves and they’re constantly try to fill that void.
They tend to forget that happiness is a self-sufficient quality, you cannot find it in others, you have to find it in yourself and be satisfactory with what you have before making or expecting the next person to bring out that side of you.

I will not be totally oblivious to the fact that we are all likely to get hurt when someone is not loyal to us.  Especially if we are romantically entwined to that person.
It has however come to my attention that people don’t like monogamous relationships.  They view them as rather complex and demanding.  If people didn’t mind being in a polygamous one, then there will be no cheating.  But pure openness and a balance because as stated that two is better than one, but then again three is a crowd.

After thoroughly thinking about this and making sense of it.  I shared it with my friend to try and ease her stress and help her move on.  She thinks I’ve completely lost it.  She called me heartless and inconsiderate.
I hope that someday it will make sense to her that, because her partner cheated on her it’s not her fault and that no one is flawless.

Previous by Kopano

2013 Aug. 31: Black Lesbian Visual Activist wins Mbokodo award

and

2013 Aug. 13: Love Transcends and Love Prevails

by Thulielove Gifted Hands Sodumo

I could lose and find myself in a woman’s touch.
It makes me turn in and out of myself.
The soft feather light touches.
So deliberate and meant
The softness of the lips against my skin
The warm tongue leaving trails of soft,
warm and wet ecstasy

I need a touch.

Yes a touch that will break all barriers.
This touch will be so soft and gentle.
It will touch my soul and all the butterflies
will reside in my tummy.
I will close my eyes and lose myself in the touch.
In my lust-induced stage
I will fall and melt under the mercy of this touch.
I will be warm, pliant and very willing
for the touch to explore my body
Moan low and sexy.
In a controlled passion the touch will fondle,
stroke the pressure so subtle.
The heat generated by the friction of skin against skin
will drive me absolutely and completely wild.

My skin will burn,
the thrill of excitement racing through me.
I will squirm under the touch.
lose every sense I have in the feel of the bare
flesh strung tight by the heady
hope that the touch would slip lower and lower.
The air is sultry sexy somehow
as if every molecule has joined the touch
to caress and tease my overheated skin.

A low pressure will mount in-between my legs,
a telltale dampness that will want me to be stroked.
Breathing will be shallow.
Eyes closed
Make a little gasping noise.
Eyes barely opened
The heat inside me will show through my eyes.
As if a pilot light is nestled right there
in between my thighs
I won’t be able to turn down the lust.
Like a mental slut all my fantasies will play in my head.
Feeling a bit like a very turned-on lab rat.
A warm languor will spread through my entire body.

Touch.
I’d feel light-headed.

Touch.
Bordering on desperation, gasping to breath.

Touch.
Dammit voice so low and sultry

I will scream
“take me as I am”
I will shiver in anticipation.
Absorbing the touch, memorizing how it feels
as if I want to hang on the memory forever.
Exhilarating sensation.
I will be on the edge, right on the precipice
A feather light touch and I’d explode
with an orgasm like nothing I’d seen before.
Body twitching as I writ against the hand
Under a woman’s touch the possibilities are endless.

Previous by Thulielove
2013 June 11: Double Trouble

and

2013 April 3: Reflecting on InterSexions

and

2013 April 4: Gender blind

Back row in a green blazer, Lebogang Magaela from Twatwa was crowned Mr Gay Daveyton and runner-ups were Nontuthuzelo Mduba (1st prince) and Sphiwe Mbatha (2nd Prince).
Front row: Nhlanhla ‘Fiona’ Thabatha from Duduza was crowned Miss Gay Daveyton, and Thabo Mathengwa (1st princess) and Kiddo Zitha (2nd princess).
Photo by Collen Mfazwe

by Lesego Tlhwale

The Rhoo Hlatswayo Arts Centre in Daveyton was a buzz on Saturday, 14^th September 2013, as the LGBTI community came in numbers to watch gays and lesbians competing for the title of Mr & Miss Gay Daveyton.

Glitz and glamour were the order of the night as the LGBTI youth of Daveyton flocked the community centre to cheer for their favorite contestants. The prestigious event was organized by Uthingo which is headed by Lesiba Mothibe, who is the mastermind behind the pageant and a reigning queen. Lesiba was crowned Miss Gay Valentine (2003), which was the first pageant of its sort to be hosted in Daveyton.

Xoli Lewinski the MC at the event kept the crowd entertained with her wit and impeccable sense of humor.  The pageant fanatic also enjoyed performances by local dance groups and the fabulous Miss Ellah from Simply Blue left the crowd in awe with her melodic voice.

The pageant went on and contestants showed off in their creative wear, swimsuits and evening wear. However, the seemingly successful event took a turn when the contestants took part in a general knowledge session, where they were asked LGBTI related questions.

If the pageant was a national or international event, the South African LGBTI community would have been left red-faced with embarrassment by the level of knowledge the youth of South Africa has about LGBTI history.

Most of the contestants could not answer simple direct questions about issues that affect them on a daily basis. “Thank you for the question, but I don’t know the answer”, was one of the many startling answers from the contestants.

The lack of knowledge regarding ‘queer literacy’ within the LGBTI youth of South Africa is an issue not to be ignored.

If our local pageant winners are going to represent their communities in national Mr & Miss Gay pageants, they need to up their game and inform themselves with adequate knowledge.  Beauty alone will not pull them through to victory.

Nonetheless, Nhlanhla ‘Fiona’ Thabatha from Duduza was crowned Miss Gay Daveyton, and Thabo Mathengwa became (1^st princess) and Kiddo Zitha (2^nd princess).

Lebogang Magaela from Twatwa was crowned Mr Gay Daveyton and her runner-ups were Nontuthuzelo Mduba (1^st prince) and Sphiwe Mbatha (2^nd Prince).

The overall contestants…

Previous by Lesego

Queer spots pointed for our first Johannesburg People’s Pride

and


2013 Aug. 6: Invisibility of black lesbians ‘From safe harbours to Equality’

and

…

by Charmain Carrol

Today marks exactly a year and seventeen (17) days since Mandisa Mbambo was laid to rest in iNanda Township, Durban in KwaZulu Natal. One might wonder what the relevance of this information is and if it is of any use in people’s lives.

This incident is significant to me particularly because I am an out lesbian woman, and to read that Mandisa was found in her backroom naked, beaten up, her hands and feet tied up under a pile of clothing. It was also assumed that she might have been raped, all because she was an openly out butch lesbian. This really hit home and it hit hard.

Isolezwe newspaper clipping featuring Mandisa Mbambo’s murder.
Issued on 3rd Sept. 2012

Mandisa Mbambo was born on the 15th October 1978, now this means she was born just a year later after I was born. I cannot begin to imagine myself dying because of my sexuality. I mean being a lesbian is the only thing that I know how to be and that’s just who I am.

My lesbian sexuality comes after me being just a human being.
A human being who deserves to live like any other person on earth, with the same rights.  I deserve respect just like Mandisa deserved to live. She did not deserve to die in any cruel manner that she did.

According to ISolezwe newspaper, amongst the people who attended her funeral was Legislature Deputy Speaker Mtholephi Mthimkhulu, who said “the killing of Mandisa was immoral and uncalled for” he also said that “she had a right to be a lesbian”

Those were profound words which we all want to believe as lesbians but cannot live a day pass them, because they are nothing but ink on paper.  The text scripted on our SA Constitution which declares that same sex loving individuals have the right to be who they are, they have a right to life and not to be discriminated against. It is evident that the SA Constitution is not as effective as it should be.  A thought constantly comes up in my head if what the legislature deputy said still echoes at the back of someone else’s.

Next year mark 20 Years of Democracy in South Africa.
I always question myself, what this mean for me as a black lesbian mother who lives in the township?
If the constitution failed Mandisa and all the other hate crime victims, what’s to become of me? What’s to become of all of us who are condemned to be sinners and ‘un-African’ only because we love people of the same sex.
Does this mean we should continue to live in fear?
Does this mean we also incite and inflict pain on our fellow brothers before they do it to us?

One should not blame such atrocious behaviours to be the SA governments fault.  I will also not deprive myself from enjoying my Freedom because I fear the slightest sight of a man. Am I to fear my brother, my father, my uncle?
Do I tell my daughter not to ever trust men?
I am not comfortable with  living in paranoia because it is unhealthy and unnecessary.
The question remains, who is to blame for this ill behaviour, if not the government?
If not me for walking late on the streets and if not the perpetrators because they were merely ‘correcting’ what they perceive to be (in)correct?
Who is to blame?

Two words: dysfunctional families!
I believe that as a country we lack values, we have lost respect for one another, and poverty has lost the value and the meaning of life.  Our family systems are broken and all those are the social imperfections of this country.  We also can’t justify the act of murder on that, yes truth is the flaws  are there, visible for everyone to see.  What change are we making?
What ideas are we instilling on our children as parents, educators and members of society?

Being a lesbian did not make Mandisa less human, because she had friends, she had a family and she probably had a partner, if that’s not human enough than what constitutes humanity?
She touched many lives.

I spoke to Ramazan Ngobese who attended the funeral and actually appeared in the Isolezwe newspaper dated the 3 September 2012 carrying Mandisa’s body into the hall.

She says:” I don’t want to lie and says I revisited the family, I did not. There was no follow up what so ever, the thing with us lesbians we are not united. We get so hyped up in marching and protesting. There’s no one else to blame but ourselves.”

Rama continued to say “until we bring our Pride Marches to the townships in the community that we live in, we will have no change.  Hosting Gay Pride in the City of Durban did not make sense for me because all the rapes and brutal murders of the lesbians and gays are happening in the townships. Maybe it’s lack of understanding of who we are in the communities.
If we had Pride marches in the townships where families have queer children. A queer child the families they don’t understand will then see that there are others like him or her.”

Ngobese also pointed out that there is discrimination amongst lesbians themselves.  She continued and said, “there are still a lot of rapes that are not reported because we as butch lesbian are afraid.
The shame of being ridiculed as to how can you say you are a man and be raped?
We are men to our wives and girlfriends. Sonke siyakwazi lokho, but to everyone else we are just women who need to be taught a lesson. This is something serious and painful and nothing to make fun of.”

In conclusion Ngobese said “ we need to unite and let God into our lives. Bring Gay Pride to our communities and we will make a change in that way. Unkulunkulu angeke ayekele izingane zakhe zifele emanyaleni.”

According to Sam Khanyile who said last year that, “I have not moved from my home, I still live in the same community Mandisa lived in. We need to do awareness drives in the community so they know we exist. We are Christians, we are sisters, we are aunts, we are mothers, and we too have mothers.

Moving from my neighbourhood will not change anything.
Khanyile who was also one of Mandisa’s coffin carriers has since moved from the neighbourhood but stated that it was not because of what had happened to Mandisa but she needed to be close to work.

She also expressed deep concern and guilt that she had not been to see the family, but is planning to go back to iNanda to do a candle light ceremony for all the Queer people who were brutally murdered and raped in that township.

Khanyile was not sure whether an unveiling had been done for Mandisa.

NB:  ***Please note that we will report on the outcome of Mandisa Mbambo’s murder case of Aug. 2012.

Previous by Charmain

2013 July 31: No title

and

2013 June 28: So What Is This?


and

2013 June 26: S/he is a Bleeding Man


and

2013 Feb. 8: “Let your voices be heard”


and

2013 Feb. 12: Mo(u)rning in the morning


and

2013 March 8: Affirmation – I Am A Lesbian


and


2013 Feb. 8: Mo(u)rning the loss …

All photos by Najib Nafib (6th Sept. 2013)
Where:  Amsterdam
What: fo(u)nd opening

Special thanks to Prince Claus Fund for making the exhibition possible.

For further reading click here

Photos by Akhona Hailele (26.10.203)

About the photographer

Akhona Hailele was born on the 6th of November 1989 in Queenstown,
Eastern Cape and later moved to King Williams Town.
Hailele then moved to Johannesburg in 2011 to further her studies.
She is currently studying Motor Mechanics at Central Johanneburg College.
Hailele joined Inkanyiso early this year (2013) and has since showed a great interest in Photography and has been documenting for the organisation.

Related links 


2013 Sept. 30: Intimate kisses at Soweto Pride 2013

Location:  Credo Mutwa Park, Soweto. Johannesburg, South Africa. Photos by Zandile Makhubu & Zanele Muholi © 2013/09/28

Previous article on Soweto Pride


2013 Sept. 29: Soweto Pride 2013

and

http://africasacountry.com/soweto-pride/

In this Episode 1: CC chats with Rene about her work, art and writing…

Previous on Rene

2013 Feb. 7: Art Is Where the HeART is

and

2013 Oct. 10: Marang a Letsatsi exhibit review

and

2013 Oct. 24: Black, Proud & Out and Deaf

Performing The Future white woman of Azania.
Procession-deambulation of d’Athi Patra Ruga.

Video taken with iPhone 4 by Valerie Thomas in Paris.

More on Athi Patra Ruga

Eiffel Tower in Paris is the tourists’ attraction.
For most visitors who come to the City of Love this structure is a must to see.
For the love of photography we captured these from Val’s apartment in Belleville.
The photos were taken in one day few hours apart by Themba Vilakazi and Zanele Muholi.
Not photoshopped, the colors were like that…

Camera used: Canon 6D with 200 mm lens and teleconverter.

More to come…

L-R: Themba Vilakazi & Zanele Muholi in Paris (4th Nov. 2013)
by Zanele Muholi with RC6 remote control.

by S’bu Kheswa

Pointing at me “UBusi ka S’gara – this is Busi, S’gara’s daughter” said Sis Fiki, one of the aunties in my neighbourhood.
This is some thirty years ago, I don’t even know what they were talking about but at the time it didn’t matter as it was common of adults to talk about me.
All the attention was not about me, it was about my father.
I miss him. I think about him and even more lately.
When I am well dressed and smelling good I really wish he was around to witness my growth.
In my wildest dreams I can see him boasting to his friends about his oldest son. Other kids got toys and dolls and even school uniforms from their fathers. I got none of that but I know for sure my father loved me.

At any given day I would be playing with my friends in the dusty streets of Soweto and my father would be on his way to his friends or to a local soccer match or to gamble dice. He would just demand I go with him and I would gladly join him.
My family would worry so much as I would be gone for hours on end.
They always feared that he would take me for good.
At Sju’s shebeen Sis Margaret told my father “S’gara uchama into enhle – S’gara you ejaculate a nice thing.”
I seem to think that this compliment was about my good looks.
Given my generosity, I am very much willing to share this compliment with him.

It is sometimes disappointing that many people don’t experience me as someone from Soweto. I am from Zola, eMzambia, eZola emabhodini  kwamshay’zafe!
Zola was one of the notorious sections of Soweto.
My father was one of the guys who ensured Zola’s bad reputation.
Different generations from Zola have witnessed all kinds of crimes that you can imagine, be it car hijackings, jackrolling, house breaks and robbery.

It was a very sad Saturday afternoon to me as the community was ululating watching the police arresting S’gara for robbing people of their possessions.
This is my father we are talking about.
Couldn’t the police pardon him?
I wished people could understand that when this guy is out of prison no one could touch me.
Instead guys and tsotsis would greet me and tell one another “this is S’gara’s kid”.
As a child I wished to have my parents in the same household.
In retrospect, I think it was good that they ended it when I was conceived.

The 90s were an important era in the lives of many South Africans.
Kwaito emerged in this era and this music genre affirmed many young people from the townships.
Kwaito also produced many music artists and some of them are from my township, among them are Mdu, Mandoza, Mzambiya and Zola 7.
I would like to believe that the emergence of all these stars contributed positively towards changing the reputation of Zola. I also want to believe that over the years Zola produced other kinds of stars who are not necessarily in the public eye.

One of these days I will openly share about the crimes that were committed to me as a child, later as a teenager and as an adult.
I can’t believe I have protected these criminals for so long.
Sies! Magwala ndini!
You take advantage of vulnerable.
Is this what your masculinity is about?
These bastards have infested our homes, our streets, our schools and our jobs.

I’ve had to live with this paradox for the longest time in my life.
Look!
Being a female-bodied boy was not going to exempt me from men’s cruelty.
Believe me when I say it is very hard to identify with your abuser.

I am my father’s son. I aspire to be an honourable man, a man who is not a threat to anyone.  I dream to be a man that my mom, my sister, my wife, my daughter and friends will be proud of. I also hope to be a man that younger man can look up to.

Please do me a favour. When you bump into SisFiki please correct her “uSibusiso ka S’gara – This is Sibusiso, S’gara’s son”

Previous by S’bu

2013 Oct. 24: Jack Daniel’s

and

2013 Oct. 18: Transition is in your hands

by Zandile Makhubu

They are no strangers to the media world. Kally and Sam Mabe are a legally married lesbian couple, who shot to fame when they got married and publicised their union on various magazines including DRUM and Real magazines as well as newspapers that graced their wedding ceremony to the world. The couple spoke to Charmain Carrol, the host of the CC Show which is a Production of Inkanyiso Media.
They discussed preparations and the road to their future together, which will be aired soon on Inkanyiso TV.

Sam & Kally.
Photos by Xana Nyilenda (25.10.2013)

Passionate about each other and family, they speak of their 6 year old son Kabo, who is their joy and happiness. Sam quickly adds, “No one can dispute that he is my son even though I am not his biological mother.”
Earlier this year, the Mabe family were marred by controversy regarding their son facing discrimination because he had said that he had two mothers at school.
“Our son had told us that at school they were talking about parents at home and he stood up and told the teacher he had two mothers and a father” Sam says.
The headmaster gave them an ultimatum to either break up or have the child dismissed from school because they had not disclosed their sexuality to the school.
They were faced with discrimination but most importantly, their son potentially being dismissed from school.
After numerous meetings with the school, Kabo was allowed to stay in the school, with no further incidents since.

Being in the spotlight has not changed them. Kally a successful IT Specialist and Sam a Mechanical Engineer says they are enjoying life together as any normal married couple would.
And they laugh off the suggestion that they are a picture perfect couple. “There is nothing perfect about us, we are also human and make mistakes,” Kally explains.

Their relationship hasn’t been all roses and violets. “I sat my family down and told them that I want to get married to the woman I love,” says Kally explaining that it wasn’t easy at all for her family.
“They met up with Sam, and blatantly told her to break up with me and to never see me again.” Although they faced difficulties before getting married, they never gave up on each other, and the challenges they faced brought them even closer together.
Their families have accepted their marriage, Kally proceeds to say, “All I wanted to do was the right thing and make an honest woman of my wife.”

p.84 Drum magazine of 7th June 2012 featured the best wedding of Kally & Sam.
Original source: DRUM

Seeing them together makes it clear how strong their love is and that nothing can stand in their way. Further proof is that even when their wedding bands were stolen, rather than re-purchasing and having to go through the process of the bands being blessed by their priest again, they opted to have their ring fingers tattooed, with the symbol of Infinity literally inked forever on their fingers.
Participating in a photo shoot for a portfolio of themselves orchestrated by Inkanyiso Productions, the couple spoke of how they wanted to do this a long time ago but couldn’t find the people and the right atmosphere to do it.

Despite the hurdles that the young couple had to overcome, it wasn’t long after we began photographing them, that we saw a different side of them, the witty sarcasm,fun loving and content side that we grew to envy. They shared their lives with us and their plans, Sam supported by her partner, is an aspiring singer under the alias “SAVALI” who already has records and has showcased some of them at the third annual LGBTI awards held at the State Theatre in Pretoria on the 26^th of October 2013 as well as the third Pink Girl Fest in Magaliesberg on the 21 September 2013.

The Mabe’s have their lives to look forward to and the family they plan to build with their son, and hopefully expand the pack in the future.

Young beautiful, intelligent, stylish and focused couple, Sam & Kally,  after the CC show…
Photos by Xana Nyilenda (25.10.2013)

Related articles

Split up or son will be expelled, school tells lesbian couple

Previous by Zandile 

2013 Feb. 14: Hello, my name is Zandile, and I am in love with a woman

...for Thapelo Makutle

All throat now…..already brighter than the stars.

I could hold you in my song. Sotto voce, tremble

against me: a breeze slips in, cools my blood

to garnet…..bed stained with stones, cold and finally

useless………..I Orpheo,…..I lyre. Down river, even damned

with hum, there is room for your cry in my mouth……Sweet,

sweet sotto voce, I sang your moan until…..the machete

swung…..then I kept singing. I eyeless,…..I eternal.

The guards hold blades to the sky and cut the dark open.

Do you hear me raining……….from the wound? My tongue

is a kingdom……You live there.

—Saeed Jones

About the author

Saeed Jones is the author of the chapbook When the Only Light is Fire (2011, Sibling Rivalry Press) and poetry collection Prelude To Bruise (Forthcoming 2014, Coffee House Press.)
His work has appeared in Best Gay Stories 2013, Guernica, Ebony Magazine, The Rumpus, Hayden’s Ferry Review and West Branch among other publications. He received his MFA in Creative Writing at Rutgers University – Newark. He is the recipient of fellowships from Cave Canem and Queer / Arts / Mentors.
He is the editor of BuzzFeed LGBT and lives in New York City.

Related links

Gentle man’s brutal murder turns spotlight on intolerance

Thapelo’s service

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6piy1aBJzQ

Thapelo’s funeral

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UGRhrQC3VgI